The Jakarta Globe, Apr 11, 2014
By Budi Tomaso
This, dear reader, is the thirteenth and final article examining that unique Asian republic – Gilanesia – as it revved up the national engine room in a historic election year.
Well, the farce has been played out and what hope there was that Gilanesia might get its act together and move forward into reform, justice and prosperity for all has been dashed.
Now it is simply a case of “Play it again, Sam”. Corrupt and inefficient business as usual for the next four years.
Gilanesia by name, Gilanesia by nature, Gilanesia got what it deserved – a hung coalition of mediocrities – led by the Three Stooges.
What happened in the elections was largely a protest by the voters. But sadly the protest has hurt the protestors. In the first place, they protested against the lies and corruption of the previous dominant Party and Presidency which trampled on the trust given them by the nation.
They were lucky to get off so lightly. They should have been consigned to the garbage dump – nevertheless they have been sent a humiliating message – and they deserve it.
The voters likewise protested against the shillyshallying and backroom deals foisted on them by the political elite who treated the electorate with contempt. How often did we hear dismissive and patronizing comments by party officials of all hues, condescendingly informing us plebs that candidates would be announced when they were ready to announce them and not before. It all smacked of lack of accountability, transparency and arrogance.
Well, one Party has learned the hard way that to do so can backfire. When Mrs. Cuddly finally got around to ‘allowing’ Mr. Skinny to become the presidential nomination it was all too little too late.
She and her cronies expected that Mr. Skinny’s nomination – even at such a late stage in the race – would create a surge of popularity for her party and on the strength of that, he and her and the party would ride in on a wave of popularity and establish themselves easily as frontrunners without the need of coalition partners.
And this is what in fact the country needed – a strong and independent party that could lead with a majority in parliament and cabinet. But how wrong they were. They thought they were riding on the crest of a wave for the white sands of sweet victory. Instead they came crushing down on the rocks. This is because of the arrogance of a system where a party leader alone ultimately nominates the presidential candidate, meanwhile keeping the electorate dangling on a string.
Well, Mrs. Cuddly has now harvested the fruit of such undemocratic, Neanderthal thinking. Mrs. Cuddly lost the last two elections and she’s lost this one too despite leading the vote tally. The sooner she is dumped by her party the better.
As for Mr. Skinny, I have often said before and do so even more now, that the Mr. Skinny ‘phenomenon’ is the product of party and media spin doctors and hype. To suggest that the party to which he is tied to has won a victory at the polls is laughable.
They simply got more votes than other parties because there was such a dismal choice and he was the best of a bad bunch. Had there been a real leader – a real reformer – someone with independent authority – things would have been very much different. Instead it was a woeful selection of candidates, none of whom you would buy a used car from.
If he is elected president he will be a puppet. And anyway, for him to be elected president in the present situation will more than likely mean that ‘traditional’ methods of money politics and influence trading will be the way to go.
Hence, it’s business as usual in Gilanesia. Corruption and inefficiency will be the continuing form of government. This election is not going to usher in a new age. In fact, it will be worse.
Mr. Skinny is now joined on stage by the other two Stooges. What an act! Is that the best Gilanesia can come up with? A smiling, sugar coated empty peanut shell; a self-serving, grasping businessman whose word and bond mean nothing and a pathological war criminal with a napoleon complex. Great stuff! By handing power to these fellows it’s as if the country is sleepwalking into disaster.
Meanwhile, the religious parties that would see Gilanesia turned, even more, into a theocracy under Sharia law have also made advances at the polls. This, too, is an indication of protest by those millions who live on two dollars a day and feel alienated and embittered and seek order and justice in a country ruled by corruption. They mistakenly think that handing the country over to a closed way of thinking will solve all the problems. These people seem unaware of what is happening in many parts of the world where violence, poverty, oppression and fear are the order of the day due to governments run by religion.
Then again, some simply voted for religious parties or people wearing headscarves because in Gilanesia about half the population don’t finish high school. A better educated society tends to be more discerning and informed when it comes to elections and don’t judge simply by appearances.
I predict dark days ahead for Gilanesia. Gilanesia needed an outright winner – both party and president – with a clear and unfettered mandate to lead the country into a reformed future.
However, because of the dismal line up of candidates which resulted in a lack of choice (a question of choosing the best of a bad lot) and the entrenched system of money politics, Gileanesia has bogged itself down in the political rice paddy. Because there was no outstanding, obvious choice, and little to differentiate the candidates, except in the case of one pathological nightmare, people squandered their votes.
Reform is out of the question at present because Gilanesia is without an independent leader capable of inspiring and carrying the country with him. Now the cynical, the venal and the downright corrupt will cobble together an unworkable coalition that will horse-trade the presidency and the cabinet and make reformist, efficient government impossible.
The people will continue to suffer under a system of massive inequality, giving fuel to the fires of all kinds of radical groups and playing into the hands of opportunists who would love to seize control of the country illegally. All because Gilanesia has no towering, strong, courageous and charismatic leader. Just the same-old, same-old mob of self-interested money grabbers led by the Three Stooges.
This election process was a farce from beginning to end because there was never any credible and outstanding candidates to vote for. A country gets the politicians it deserves. And with the Three Stooges coming out on top it only goes to show that in Gilanesia the old saying — “You can fool some of the people all of the time and you can fool all of the people some of the time, but you can’t fool all of the people all of the time” — does not ring true, rather the opposite. In Gilanesia all of the people have been fooled by fools again.
Gilanesia is leaderless and rudderless. The country has lost its moral and political compass. And that creates a dangerous political vacuum that can easily be exploited. Going on Gilanesia’s past, I expect it will be.
So in the end, who won the elections in Gilanesia? The usual coalition of money politics and self-preservation for the elite. Who lost the elections in Gilanesia? The people of Gilanesia did.
You see why all this is so is that back in the 1940s Gilanesia failed to have the revolution it really needed. That revolution is still to happen.
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